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The Secret to Leveling Up in Any Area of Your Life

The Secret to Leveling Up in Any Area of Your Life

With a little more time to reflect and a bit more lifeforce to actually execute now that my kids are finally back in school fulltime, I am doing my damndest to push thru self-imposed glass ceilings and question the validity of disempowering thought patterns.

Diving deep into not only childhood wounds , but the “shadowy” aspects of my personality, I have recognized a prevalent block lurking in my subconscious- the false construct of “scarcity’ as it relates to intangible concepts (ex. success, abundance, happiness, beauty).

While I could totally go off on a tangent about the various ways in which the internalization of “not enough” can be damaging to our morale, today I want to explore this concept in relation to “leveling up” as I feel many of us are eager to take our aspirations to the next level after a year of slowing down.

A few days ago, I came across a quote which really resonated with me- perfectly articulating the mindset I adapted while achieving my recent 20 pound weight loss

“Transform jealousy to admiration, and what you admire will become part of your life.”

-Yoko Ono

Fighting the urge to be jealous of my two fitness-model workout partners while trying to shave off 15 pounds in the gym, instead of allowing myself to be triggered by their physical prowess, I made a conscious effort to transmute my envy into inspiration.

The simple conversion of envy into admiration not only helped me to see where I was playing small, but it also gave me a much more expansive view of what was actually possible for my own physique.

Observing my stronger, fitter workout buddies give 100 percent of themselves to each workout revealed to me that I had been settling for mediocrity – justifying my mediocre figure with bullsh*t excuses.

But instead of spiraling into a triggered, competitive state, I decided to humble myself, acknowledge my short-comings and vow to not only do better, but learn their ways.

Not only did this reframe foster beautiful friendships, it also propelled me to my goal of attaining my ideal weight (five months later).

In a society where competition -based on the false notion of scarcity-drives our entire way of living, I think it is only a reflexive reaction to perceive others “wins” as threatening. However, it’s high time we take a step back and question our unconscious programming.

In most cases, what we desire (connection, love, success, self-esteem) is not quantifiable nor finite.

Another person’s attainment of what you desire does not diminish your own chance of attaining it , nor does denying yourself happiness amount to greater happiness for another’s sake (it’s not like we are slicing a freakin’ happiness pie over here).

tips for dealing with jealousy or compettition

Sadly enough, I especially see the issue of jealousy, competition, and ultimately “cattiness”, prevalent among females.

While our patriarchal society has undeniably programmed women to compete with one another (because we are waaay more powerful in unity), it’s important to recognize this conditioning for what it is.

This way of thinking is nothing more than a symptom of scarcity mentality.

But in this ever-expanding universe(yes…space itself is in a perpetual state of expansion), rest assured that there truly is enough to go around.

Challenge yourself to be INSPIRED- instead of THREATENED- by the women a step ahead of you.

Let them be your mirror- reflecting back to you not only what is possible, but perhaps revealing more to you about your soul’s authentic desires, which have most likely been buried under self-doubt or people pleasing.

quotes about envy

Instead of shaming yourself for experiencing envy, harness it as a tool for self-exploration. What is that green-eyed monster revealing to you about your own desires?

Transmuting jealousy into inspiration, is one of the best ways to level up to your next layer of potential.

How would you know of the endless possibilities that await you if there weren’t others, farther along the way, to show you?

I hope you found this soul hack empowering.

Now get out there and design some good vibes along with a fabulous life.

If you found this post helpful, it would mean the world to me if you could share with a friend or on social media…

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My journey in interior design and home improvement began with transforming my first fixer-upper home, all while managing a budget and raising two young boys. My work, a reflection of my passion for creating beautiful, uplifting spaces, has been recognized by top publications like Better Homes and Gardens Magazine, HGTV, and more. I invite you to explore my site and witness the transformation of my home and the vibes we've designed.Read more...


Wednesday 31st of March 2021

No truer words have you written Erica - "Another person’s attainment of what you desire does not diminish your own chance of attaining it, nor does denying yourself happiness amount to greater happiness for another’s sake (it’s not like we are slicing a freakin’ happiness pie over here)." Love this post!

Designing Vibes

Wednesday 31st of March 2021

I really appreciate your feedback, Nadine. Posts like this are very difficult for me to write, but if it helps just one person, than it is totally worth the discomfort. xoxo


Wednesday 31st of March 2021

There is a reason I look forward to your posts. Always. I think sometimes our mirrors in our mind do not reflect the true self, and certainly not true self worth. This is a FABULOUS post!!!!!!! Thanks for putting it all out there:)

Designing Vibes

Wednesday 31st of March 2021

So grateful our paths have crossed, Maria. You are such a ray of light in this crazy a$$ world.

Tanya Derrey

Wednesday 31st of March 2021

Spot on, and I love the ownership which unlocks our potential and clears a BS free path, awesome!

Designing Vibes

Wednesday 31st of March 2021

Yes, girl! I love how you condensed it down to "ownership". Owning up to our own BS is where true growth happens. It's a much more empowering way to go thru life. Thank you so much for taking the time to share your positive feedback. :)


Wednesday 31st of March 2021

Erica- Thank you so much for this timely and thought-provoking post! As usual, you are dropping truth bombs that I have found to be useful in my life. As far as the gym goes- yes, my wonderful trainer and several others are farther along and therein lies the inspiration. I am working hard and making progress- if it happened overnight, I don’t know that I’d appreciate the journey as much. The same analogy can be applied to my home renovation and other areas of life. Thanks again, enjoy your week and keep inspiring!

Designing Vibes

Wednesday 31st of March 2021

Yes, Donna! I completely agree with you- I don't think that the attainment of the goal would be nearly as sweet if it were an easy, overnight sort of success. Thanks for your kind words. You put a big smile on my face today (and that's saying a lot with a pesky wisdom tooth coming in, giving me grief. haha!) :)